Scribes 1987

252 - Sun 20 Dec 1987 - Brig O Feugh - Tim & Jackie Little - Scribe: Aids

Run 252 Sun 20 Dec 1987

WOT I DID ON SUNDAY

(By Adrian The Mole Aged 34 and a Little Bit)

I woke up this eing Sun ay orning which ollows airly closely a ter Satur ay night is as ig a surprise to e as it is to you. My hee i not hurt uch an the sun was shining even igger surprise an as no one ha staye or reak ast ore to the point no one ha co e ho e or cocoa I went ashing.

Wen I got there I was late so the he teacher sai I ha to write this story he is a ig ully. Their was lots o other peoples their two. One o the , Mr Pig Pen had a big bandage on his arm (Miss Panther says it's coz he wanks to uch - wot oes that ean? . So eo the peoples ha

one a lot o runs so they wos given new sweaty shirts. The he teacher then sqeeze irty stu all over the he is very silly an they sqerte there pop all over the other peoples they are silly too.

We then run. We run on so eroa s an on so e iel s. We then run in so e woo s. A ter that we run on su roa s again. It was un. Then we run in the river. It wis not un it was kol . We run in su ore woo s. So eo the peoples wos like little oys an girls P.S. I like little girls aqn through u an stu at each other. We then run in the woo s. A ter we run in the wou s we run up a ig hill. My legs was very tyre . On top o the ig hill was a ig stone thing. Miss Julia sai it re in e her o so ewon ut she i not say who. Mr Martin ha a sleep with a ig cow pat or a peelow he is silly. When we run own the hill the other peoples run the other way to e la very silly.

A ter we run own the hill we ha so e hot rinks an say so e irty pictures P.S. I like pictures.

Then we went or our lunch. That is the eno y story. DOWN DOWNS I think?

Gold Top 75 Runs

Tim For Being a are

Bev For leaving again

Not Dot For not having one last week

Pig Pen For wanking too uch an eing a here

Alan (Hashshit) For having a shave ash an le - The Shaver or Close Shave or Mr Bruan?

Fuck Milk ... Got Beer?

The Runners:

Trevor ANCELL Little Shit

Adrian ATKINSON Aids

Bruce BRICKNELL Pigpen

Mick BRIGGS

Bev BROWN Brown Owl

Rosemary COCKS

Paul DUMONT

Ian FEGEN Numbskull

Anne Marie TURION The Dutches

David FERGUSON Fergie

Ross HALL Running Sore

Sarah INNES Pink Panther

Julia FYFE Bannana

Steve LEVER Labotomy

Tim LITTLE

Jackie LITTLE

John McINNES Michelin Man

Diane SMITH Gold Top

Gordon PARK Biggles

Andy PATON Bald Eagle

Gerry POTTER The Envoy

Kent PRESTON Superman

Liz REIJS

Martin RICHMOND Sonic

Anne RICHMOND Thruppenny Bits

Dave ROBB Dad Dad

Ronnie ROBB Wild Local

Howard ROPER Hippo

Alison SMITH Big Al

Ron STRACHAN The Penguin

Alan TAILFORD

Dave TAYLOR

Richard THOMPSON Stomper

Simon WIJKER

Derek WOOD Captain Bligh


209 - Sun 15 March 1987 - Bennachie - Hares: Pink Panther & Mum Mum - Scribe: Fergie

Run 209 Bennachie 15th MARCH 1987

Hares: Sarah Innes / Julia Fyffe...

Having been away at the Peebles 10th the previous week, I ended up phoning Sarah at 10-00 to find out where this Sundays hash was.

Arriving at the Donveiw Carpark just before 11:00am. I was just in time to find Stomper and Howard marking on the gravel the distances they thought Ian "Watch my knee” Fegen would skid when entering the carpark, in both cases they were wrong because Anne Marie was there to keep him be under the thumb.

My arrival was closely followed by that of the Pink Panther, JC (2nds) and Alison, JC (2nds) comment on getting out of the car was “I'm not one of the hares was only here yesterday to carry the bag”, why he made Sarah walk I'll never know. .

It was one of those hashes that was never going to be fast, after only about 100 metres we met up with Ross Hall who was up to his knees un mud and locker as happy as a pig in shit.

We eventually got on our way again only to catch up with Julia to be told Bu her that she didn't know where the Trail went as she was lost again and in doing so found more mud, at this point it should be noted that Dave Robb at great personal Risk to protect Sarah from the mud slingers but it was to no avail she was dragged into the mud and covered from head to toe in shiggy. She also took this opportunity inform us of a fairly new runner that was not adverse to thing muddy, so only a short time later Ronnie and Ross made sure Sandra was suitably covered.

The hash ambled from one muddy patch to the next with everyone, apart from Ian 'Watch my knee' Fegen who took it in mind that any one going close to him, he hit with a big stick, getting coated with mud. he Wild Local had a very close inspection of the bottom of a pond and came to the conclusion that although there was no frog spawn it was still very slimy.

At this point I decided that I had had enough writing this fucking sheet so I went out for a few pints.

Three Days later I have started writing again, excuse the shaky hands.

All I have now left to do, because I’ve forgotten all the happened on Sunday is, remember the Down Downs:

'At the start: - to Fergie & J.C.(2nd).

And at the end to:

The Flying Dutchman,

Simon (for trying to be a runner)

Sandra, with the lovely body (for being a true hasher)

Ronnie Robb and Dave Robb (all I have to do is mention mud and you know why)

J.C. (I think because Sarah likes seeing his body).

And Hashit went to Numbskull, or from now on known as I am 'Watch my knee? Fagen (because from what I can gather he's just a silly cunt).

Bye for now

Fergie

The Runners

Trevor ANCELL Little Shit

Fiona BICK Fifi

Katie BROOMFIELD

John CARTER JC

John CRUICKSHANK Bentshaft

Lester DESMOND

Ian FEGEN Numbskull

Anne Marie TURION The Dutches

David FERGUSON Fergie

Julia FYFE Bannana

Ross HALL Running Sore

Sara INNES Pink Panther

Andrew MOWAT Fallguy

Andy PATON Bald Eagle

Gaynor PATON

Sandra PHILIP

Gerry POTTER The Envoy

Kent PRESTON Superman

Martin RICHMOND Sonic

Dave ROBB Dad Dad

Ronnie ROBB Wild Local

Howard ROPER Hippo

Alison SMITH Big Al

Mick STUMP

Richard THOMPSON Stomper

Sheila THOMSON Visitor

Simon W IJKER


208 - Sun 08 Mar 1987 - Mergie Farm - Hares: Numbskull & The Dutches - Scribe: Stomper

HASH NUMBER 208

8TH МARCH 1987

FEGEN . FEGEN - O MAN BARELY ALIVE. A MAN WHO CHOSE THE DELIGHTFUL, PICTURESQUE AND BLOODY DESOLATE MEARNS WOOD, SITUATED ALMOST TWO LIGHT-YEARS WEST OF STONEHAVEN, FOR THE VENUE OF THE ORGY OF DESTRUCTION. I SWORE NOT TO MENTION HIM, SO I WON’TT. SATURDAY, HE AND ANNE MARIE SAUNTEREO OF INTO THE WOODS FOR A BIT OF PLAY. SATURDAY, HE AND ANNE MARIE SAUNTERED OUT OF THE WOODS WITH 3 GOOD KNEES BEWEEN THEM. POOR NUMBSKULL. POOR US. AFTER YOUR AVERAGE SAFARI DOWN THE RIO SHIGGY TO REACH THE APPOINTED START, 17 VERY ASSORTED SOULS WERE INFORMED THAT NAVIGATION THROUGH THE GRUESOME SAVAGE WOODS OF MEARNS WOULD MORE OR LESS BE ON OUR TOD - MAME - ANNE ACCEPTED AS AN INSTINCTIVE SHORT-CUTTING HEATHEN. A QUICK WENCOME TO A VISITER FROM THE MAJORCA HASH - HA! HA! HO! HO! HE! HE! SUFFER BABY - SUFFER.

AND OFF FOROWING A COMPLETE LACK OF SPOTS UP À SMALL STREAM. AMAZINGLY, ROSS SUDDENLY REALIZED WE WEREN'T ACTUALLY HASHING, BUT CROSS COUNTRY RUNNING. THE CENTRE COVERING OF SNOW GREATLY ASSISTED IN THE TOTAL DISAPPEARENCE OF FLOUR. FIONA, JC AND A SQUAD OF TELEPATHISTS. SOMEHOW REACHED A CHECK CUNNINGLY CONCEALED IN THE CENTRE OF A SNOW COVERED TRACK. DAVE ROBB, DEREX AND MYSELF WANDERED OFF UP A NICE WEE TRACK WITH NO THOUGHT OF COUNTING SPOTS. JUST ROUND THE HILL AND THERE, POOR DARLING, STAGGERS LONG JOHN FEGEN. "YOU BASTARD FUCKHEAD”, WE JOVIALLY GREETED HIM, AS THE ECHOES OF FORMER COMRADES MESHED WITH OTHER SINISTER SOUNDS - TREES CRASHED TO THE GROUND, WILD BOARS GRAZING, WOLVES CLEANING UP AFTER A TASTY HASHER. "DON'S SWEAR AT ME" REPLIES OUR HERO, “YOU NEED ME FOR THE DIFFICULT BITS.” WHAT A RUNT, EM? MYSELF, ADES, DEREK AND JANE NOW SAW NO ONE FOR ALMOST ½ AN HOUR WITH ME SHIVERING AND SHAKING WHILST STANDING ON A SODDING CHECK WAITING FOR THE PACK TO ARRIVE. LATER DISCUSSION INDICATED A TOTAL LOSS OF DIRECTION AND THEN MOTIVATION IN THE WOODS. EVENTUALLY, MAJORCA, RONNIE, FIONA ET AL ARRIVED IN THIS SORT OF HALF QUARRY THING - A 100' RABBIT WARREN? WE THEN SKIRTED ROUND THE HILL ABOVE THE VALLEY EYEING THE BOTTOM OF THE WEE GEN WITH MUCHO FEAR - A DISGUSTING RIVER-CROSSING LOOKED LIKELY, AND WE WERE NOT DISAPPOINTED.

DOWN. THE SQUAGGLY, TRUGGED, FLOGFULL SHOPE. TO THE NASTEST OF BITTERY BITEY, FROZY RIVER, STOMPER RAN SPILLING NONSENICAL OBJECTIVES FROM HIS GLOBBY BUT TRICEPTUAL FORM. SPLISH, AND THE FEET LIES. WERE MERE FROZY FISH.

IN ALL THIS TIME, A CAT - AS - TROPHY HAD OCCURRED! - WHERE WERE THE POUTING "PINK PANTHER AND OUR THO NEW RUNNERS, KANE AND SANDRA - BEWILDERED, VULNERABLE, COLD, AND PISSED OFF!

THE REST OF US GUZZLED THE VIN CHAND AND WAITED AND WAITED. .

HOOT! HOOT"! - WE WENT. [ ] - THEY REPLIED. AT LONG BLOODY LAST, WE COULD GENTRY CRUISE TO THE CHOSEN ALE-HOUSE - THE CAT INN AT CREELERLINE. MAIS NON !!! THE DREADED GINGERBREAD FEGEN HAD PLANNED A CROSS COUNTRY SHORT CIRCUIT VIA CRIEFF, COE AND CARDIFF. THIS SUCCESSFULLY DROPPED 6 CARS OFF THE PEACE CONVOY [PIECE OF FEGEN] LEAVING ONLY 7 OF US IN THE CREEL INN.

SEAFOOD WAS HAD. MONEY WAS EXCHANCED, THE PHONE RANG. JC, FONA, PP AND THE TWO NEW YOUNG THINGS (NYT’S) WERE ESCONCEO IN THE HEUGH STONEHAVEN - AND IMMOVABLE. AN IMPASSE WHICH LEAD TO NO DOWN DOWNS AT OUR END - SHOCK! HORROR! PROBE!

I SPRINTED BACK TO GET TO “PEGGY SUE GOT MARRIED” FOR 4 O'CROCK.

SMASH - DOOR OPEN, WHOOSH MANKY KEGS PUSHED OFF, SLURP, SPLASH - SIMULTANEOUS SHOWER AND CUP OF IT - SPRINT TO CINEMA - FILM STARTS AT 5.00. WOT A WALLY..

THANKS NUMBSKULL KNOCK-KNEE THE DWARF

ANNE MARE KLOGTULIP

THERESA A KWOK GLUVINE NGUYEN DURCH VORSPRUNG TECHNIK AND ALL OTHERS

C HEERS,

STOMPER

The Runners

Adrian ATKINSON Aids

Fiona BICK Fifi

Katie BROOMFIELD New runner

John CARTER JC

Lester DESMOND New runner

Ian FEGEN Numbskull

Anne Marie TURION The Dutchess

Ross HALL Running Sore

Sarah INNES Pink Panther

Sandra PHILIP

Branko RADDIEVIC

Dave ROBB Dad Dad

Ronnie ROBB Wild Local

Theresa ROPER Mrs T

Richard THOMPSON Stomper

Simon WIJKER

Derek WOOD Captain Bligh