Scribes

ABERDEEN HASH HOUSE HARRIERS – RUN NO. 1298                          29 JUNE 2007

WARREN HILL – DURRIS                                            HARES PIG IRON & STAINLESS

A lovely crisp cold and wet winter’s evening except that this is June. The car park was a new one to me and to most others though it must have been there for years.
The trail was set by an old man with a pogo stick who explained that the little Hs forming the trail would always be on the right hand side of the trail - except when they were on the left hand side. This information was very helpful for the pack.
The trail was in fact pretty good for an old man, leading us up a road then through very nice woods and fields and grass and bushes and fences and whins and rabbit shit and earth and streams and hills and more shit and clouds and cold and wind and trees and dykes and more grass and birds and styles and more bushes and tracks and back along a tarmac  road to the beer stop with sweeties. It was then a gentle on-in downhill to the cars. No-one got lost and all were back in just over an hour. Good run.
Even better than the run though were Olymprick’s chilli pies only five days in the back of his car but with enough chilli to kill off any germs which may have been sniffing around.
“Slightly neaten up the circle” called GM Watsoff  politely before comments on the run were called for. Most agreed that the sheltered beer stop stopped the icy wind chilling the marrow in our bones and all in all it was a good run considering the combined IQ of the hares.
Bruce Almighty was brought in for his driving skills on the way to the hash overtaking KY, our occasional visitor from Qatar, who had been gently cruising along the S Deeside Road in his Jaguar at 95.5 mph in 3rd gear. This apparently was not Hash Etiket 
There was a strange claim that Canna B Arsed was confusing the pack, though that is not difficult, by calling “Checking Ahead” then checking left. Most of the pack were at least a mile behind C B Arsed and were therefore not in the slightest bit aware of the problem.
Sans “O”’s unique parking style was noted but it was clear that it will never catch on.
Thanks Hares and hope you enjoyed your meal at The Gillies Lair.

 Dear Abby,

I've never written to you before, but I really need your advice.

I have suspected for some time now that my wife has been cheating on me. The usual signs; phone rings but if I answer, the caller hangs up. My wife has been going out with "the girls" a lot recently although when I ask their names she always says, "Just some friends from work, you don't know them."

I always try to stay awake to look out for her coming home, but I usually fall asleep. Anyway, I have never approached the subject with my wife. I think deep down I just didn't want to know the truth, but last night she went out again and I decided to really check on her.

Around midnight, I decided to hide in the garage behind my golf clubs so I could get a good view of the whole street when she arrived home from a night out with "the girls". When she got out of the car she was
buttoning up her blouse, which was open and she took her panties out of her purse and slipped them on. It was at that moment, crouching behind my clubs, that I noticed that the graphite shaft on my driver appeared
to have a hairline crack right by the club head.

Is this something I can fix myself or should I take it back to the pro shop where I bought it?
Perplexed